|"Thoughts and Stripes" acrylic and oil on canvas|
24" X 36"
|"Ebb and Flow" acrylic and oil on canvas|
30" X 30"
It took all of last year of exploration and experimentation to get to these, my latest paintings. There were moments of frustration and confusion, but also of revelation, and clarity. I hit milestones that I built upon with the satisfaction that they held integrity and were leading me further. It was a solid year of trial and error, vulnerability, and truly waiting upon the Lord for a breakthrough. Looking back, it was a good year. While it was happening, not so much! I didn't like leaving the studio having painted over previous paintings, yet again.
A major breakthrough occurred one night in my studio as I was at a peak point of frustration. It was that frustration that broke through the "carefulness" that was stifling my work. Ironically, my preoccupations of the work being strong prevented it from being impacting or dynamic. I couldn't capture the subtleties of emotion and thought that I yearned to. I was over thinking and over analyzing. Once I let go, in a fit of... 'I've had it', the work became stronger. I didn't look at those pieces for a couple of days after that breakthrough.... still unconvinced. When I did, though, I was relieved.
I am content with where I am now- for the time being (shouldn't it always be like that- there is always a place to grow into.) It has been extremely liberating to be more free with my process, something that I used to relish while painting in college. It was more difficult than I imagined to paint with the freedom that I am currently experiencing in the studio. Working in a vacuum, with limited studio time and a new domestic and maternal setting led to work that I was desperately trying to free, but couldn't. I was repeatedly stuck trying to throw caution to the wind.
It has been challenging, as my growing type A personality (in every day life -just to get things done) can stunt my flow of creativity, but I made some important breakthroughs and am thrilled with that! I am more excited to continue to break through new barriers.
Be Blessed! Be Inspired!